Rule Your Mind or it Will Rule You.

Stress is a fact of the life in our fast-paced world.  But unless we find ways to manage it, stress can lead to serious health problems, such as heart disease, substance abuse, depression, injuries and obesity.

Research confirms that individuals who suffer from stress have higher healthcare costs than non-stressed individuals. And, medical claims connected to stress come with an annual price tag for the county in the billions.

How do you define stress? Stress occurs when the individual perceives a challenge and judges that his or her coping resources may not be sufficient to manage the challenge.

Often, the reality is that we’re meeting a challenge just fine. But, if we think otherwise, the situation can become “stressful.” What some perceive as stressful may not faze others; so, in order to develop effective coping strategies, each person must learn his or her own stress triggers and responses. No one can make you feel inferior without your permission. 

Eating to Satisfy Hunger or Alleviate Stress?

Unfortunately, overeating is one of the most common responses to stress. Using food this way can make a bad situation even worse.

Common habitual behaviors used to “get through” stressful situations include:

Eating or drinking to calm down

Eating to get extra energy

Eating to avoid something unpleasant

Eating to zone out or numb feelings

Not eating when you should, because you are in a hurry

Not eating what you should, also due to time constraints

Eating too fast without adequate time to register physiological “fullness” cues

 

Goal Is to Manage Stress, Not Eliminate It

Eliminating stress is not possible, or even desirable. Appropriate levels of stress improve performance, while the absence of stress causes boredom. Just as too much stress can lead to overeating, too little stress is also associated with non-hunger eating. In our culture, we are so used to being busy and “revved up” that we are uncomfortable if bored. Lack of stress can be a trigger for those who turn to food as a source of entertainment.

Helping individuals understand how stress and excessive eating are connected, can help them prevent obesity and other health conditions. I will help you feel better, have an improved self-image, and become more productive. Everyone sets the new year's resolution goal to lose weight and gives up by week 6 because they are not getting the results quick enough or have given into the negative self talk sabotaging any success. By dealing with behaviours, we are working with things we can observe, thereby learning what triggers those behaviours, in turn getting the results you want. 

Becoming active is the most important step you can take to maintain and improve your health. Physical activity helps prevent weight gain, diabetes, heart disease, and other life-altering conditions. By engaging in physical activity, you can also reduce stress and improve mood.

Transform Your Health! Transform Your Life!  Are you finally ready to make a CHANGE? Do you want a life with greater VITALITY? Are you serious about committing to transforming your health…once and for all? Are you STRESSED out? Do you have unwanted weight, inches to lose and unsure of where to start? Together we will design a program to EMPOWER you and coach you to SUCCESS! We will work closely, and I will support you every step of the way.

Restart your life with reFre5h Life Coaching.  

The Law of Attraction

I've been fortunate enough to be blessed with a wonderful loving family. A family that would do anything for me, yet when it comes to knowing one another's needs and wishes we don't know each other at all! It's not because we don't want to know. Is it because we're afraid to be vulnerable, afraid of being hurt, afraid to reveal our true selves and disappoint those who love us most?

After years of what feels like a broken heart and trying to find love and the answers to my pain, I finally heard the voice inside me telling me that this seeking and trying to find answers to heal your broken heart isn't working.  It's true, I spent so many years complaining about the hardships I had and the failures, I forgot to recognize the good things that were happening to me today. I also failed to recognize no matter what I did, I was always going to have the love and support of my family. So why then was it so difficult to let them in and include them to what was really going on for me?

I attempted to conquer life all on my own for a very long time, to this day apart of me succumbs to the believe it's me that has to figure things out, since I made the choice that put me here. All good if you're taking responsibility for your behaviour and accountability for how your behaviour affects others, but not if the those that love you aren't allowed to participate in your life. How will they know if I don't include them?  How can they participate when I have shut them out? What would life be like if we accepted the love from family and others? When you start believing in yourself completely and believing love is available to you, who knows how high you will climb! Imagine the possibilities! 

We all want to have love in our lives and to be loved. At some point in my life I decided I wasn't worthy of it.  I was lovable and was capable of giving love, had friends, family and opportunities many wished for, so why was I alone? I determined it was better for me to be alone, I designed my life to be that way.  I had been doing everything alone and had a real difficult time accepting any kind of compassion. I learned the very thing that what was holding me back from having love in my life was not accepting love.

If we manifest a life without love, sad but true this is what we will have. If we develop a clear and centered state of consciousness and a willingness to center ourselves and use powers of the heart in a world that is difficult to find love we will invite a line up of people that want to be with us. All you have to is have a look and pick one! 

So each and every one of us are manifesting through the energy we emanate through our thoughts, words and actions. You are already interacting with the Law of Attraction; every action an equal reaction. A shift from the pushing and pulling to a realistic world in which consciousness plays a role. Keep it simple and definitely don't push.  Let go of expectations that life has to be any particular way. Let go and take life as it comes. Let go and let things be the way they are. It requires a willingness to be equals with the universe, when we are equal with all that is, we support the universe and the universe supports us.

Will YOU Be My Valentine?

Valentine's Day, February 14 celebrating love and affection between intimate companions. It is traditionally a day on which lovers express their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering chocolates, and sending cards and valentines. Since the beginning of time people have wanted to be to be in pairs. But what if you are alone on Valentine's Day or you are unsure of where you are at emotionally, or maybe you have a valentine you dream to be with?

As with everything in life we learn by our experiences and our relationships are no different. It might even be with our relationships we learn the most about ourselves and the person we were in relationship with. Our relationships whether with a mate, in the work place, family and friends and self are key to bringing balance and love into our lives. Sadly, many people think it's near impossible to manage all their relationships, they cut them loose when the going gets tough, give up and move on hoping to start all over with some one new. The sad part here is, it brings frustration to any relationship and we end up blaming others for our own miscommunication.

When we understand the wisdom of our heart we are less inclined to be alone and better equipped to bring the kind of love we want into our lives. To gain insight and clarity to where you are at emotionally this Valentine's Day invest in yourself. 

Set aside some quiet time to investigate past or present relationships. Write a letter that no one will read but will help you reveal your hearts desire. It might be to your partner, an ex, a boss, a friend or family member, ask the questions you always wanted answered. Write down all the things you couldn't say but wished you had, include all the memories good and bad. Try not to analyze it, just let it flow from your heart. When you think you have written all you can put it aside or better yet sleep on it. When you return to it highlight anything you find unusual or interesting, picking up things you might not have otherwise noticed, these are messages from your heart. Think about what they mean and what your heart is telling you. When the time is right, ask yourself what you would like to do with the letter? Put it in a keep-sake box, place in a bottle and let it go in the ocean, burn it, bury it or even send it.

Within every relationship is the power to heal and to hurt and whether we like it or not we are doing it in every moment of our lives.  If you have no Valentine this February 14th, spend some time understanding the wisdom of your hearts desire and you might just have Cupid shooting his bow and arrow inspiring you in romance and courtship.

Inner Guidance System

We all face moments when we want nothing more than to react loudly when someone pushes our buttons or do the "right thing" even though it's not the popular thing to do. Growth comes from all of our experiences. When we choose to take the "high road" it's usually a result of having taken the low road at a turn somewhere in our paths.

I was recently confronted by a situation that shocked me, and made my blood boil. Yes, sure I could have taken a big old wooden spoon and stirred that pot even further. Instead, I decided to investigate what was it about this situation that got me so angry and was it even anger?! What's really going on here? 

We all have an inner GPS that knows what's best for us that can support us to be in sync with our true selves. Making choices from consciousness and becoming more aware of feelings, needs and wants will help to guide us from map to map in the atlas called life. Emotions are what moves us to action, sometimes it's important to take your foot of the gas. It's how we use our emotions to navigate the high roads and low roads and use that information for decision-making and realize that it's not just something that happens to you. We don't just end up in the middle of the road by chance, somewhere along the way we decided on what route to take.

In the past I did take the low road on occasion and learned very quickly it leads to nowhere. I wasn't paying attention to my GPS.  Which meant I wasn't managing my emotions, handling them appropriately, or taking responsibility for my feelings either.  

It wasn't anger I discovered. There was an underlying emotion for me that this situation had triggered in my inner guidance system, and another moment in everyday life where I had a decision to make. Was I going to take the 'high road' and shrug off a negative situation or engage in it?  Needless to say, I took the "high road".  I have become more self-aware and gained further understanding of my likes and dislikes, my strengths and weaknesses and my personality ~ all parts of my inner GPS.

When we know our feelings we are better pilots in our lives. We have the emotional intelligence to manage our emotions, we cope better in tough situations. We have the skills to manage ourselves, so we don't just do whatever our impulses suggest.  We recognize emotions in others, we can empathize with others and sense their needs and are better equipped to handle our relationships.

Getting to know your GPS and how you can navigate the atlas of life will certainly make the trip less bumpy and keep you on the 'high road'.

Courage Doesn't Always Roar

Courage shows up in different ways, it can be physical like firefighters, police officers, and soldiers or in individual acts of bravery. There's another kind of courage though, and it's not a chance gift of nature that decided to just show up one day. It's a choice between two alternatives, the determination not to quit or sacrifice your wants and needs.

It certainly takes courage to face your fears, to go through the emotions and to stand up for yourself and your personal system of values. It also takes courage to live within that system of values, especially when they get tested day after day. It takes courage to stand up for what you believe in, and not to compromise your own belief system. It's that reliable consistent courage that helps to get us through our lives, it helps the terminally ill to fight another day, the unemployed to keep looking for work, the single mom who works 2 jobs, pay the bills and feed her kids.  

Within each of us is a fearless fighting warrior, not worrier.  It's means shifting from giving your powers away to something you imagined to be a disaster or horrible event to owning your powers, taking back your voice and owning what was your in the first place. Worriers tend to allow fearful and negative thoughts determine their lives, so much so they end up feeling helpless and powerless. 

Wouldn't it feel better to confront your fears,to stand strong, trust yourself and be courageous?  I would bet every time you faced your fears and did it anyway, you would say YES!

Soul Side Out

I'm a firm believer of when we be our best self or who we are meant to be we inspire others to do the same.

The project of me becoming more self aware and being my true self is taking some doing, but fortunately I only have to do it one step at a time.  I think sometimes, as most of us do, that things will change in an instant.  They don't, anything worthwhile takes dedication. And to learn more about who we really are so we can express ourselves and love in the world we need to show up in our purest form.

My relationship with myself is where it began, and by enrolling in emotional intelligence and life coaching classes(that were mostly experiential) I learned I was still carrying around baggage. It was like being in therapy for 3 months. I got in touch with my feelings again and learned how to give other people room to share theirs. An unexpected surprise took place, partly due to me projecting myself onto another classmate but mostly because my eyes opened up to what I'd been doing myself. I discovered I have the skill to work in coaching but more so for me to be a great and authentic coach, I had to be true to me.  Who was going to trust me if I hadn't dealt with my own baggage?

I needed to dump out the emotional baggage and come clean. I wanted to move forward so badly, that I had to take the risks and be vulnerable in order to understand what was holding me back. Until I came face to face with my fears and went through the emotions I would always continue to carry that baggage.  Some of it from my childhood, some of it from my teens, some in adulthood, a lot to carry around when you think about it.  But, what was getting me through this emotional pain was knowing where I was going.  I wasn't getting away from these things, I was going toward a life of soul awareness and fulfillment.

I learned to put myself in my future and design goals for my life, the life I wanted. Along the way, old patterns emerged but because I had engaged in my journey moving forward instead of the past and I wasn't trying to fix things, I was learning to locate what was important for me to become ME, my best self.   I also learned that after awhile I was a damn good coach and my classmates loved me for being authentic.

I believe it's so important to teach people how to locate their feelings and name them correctly. To communicate clearly about their inner experiences. How to make and keep agreements with ourselves and others. How to discover our life and choose conscious goals. And how to love and accept ourselves as the foundation for learning to love others.

We have been given the gift to wander and ask.  Our life is truly what we make it to be, we all know deep inside us we will find our true selves.  All you have to do is not be afraid to ask!